We got Wood

So Evan Rachel Wood likes girls. And boys. And even Marilyn Manson. (Rim shot!) Evan’s coming out as bisexual in the pages of Esquire magazine this week has caused the expected flurry of headlines that usually accompany such an announcement. That it isn’t a cover-of-Time worthy event anymore is, I think, a good thing. The days when such announcements made the cover of People magazine just might be over – at least for the everyday celebrities. I mean, I’m sure if Oprah decided to make such a proclamation she’d still warrant a cover, of course she’d use the cover of her own magazine. She’s not a gagillionaire for nothing.

Evan’s coming out came via the pages of Esquire accompanied by another one of her now patented 40s pin-up meets goth queen photoshoots. Pale skin plus naughty lingerie is never a bad idea. But something about it feels a little like playing up to the ultimate male fantasy. As if to wink and say, “She likes boys and girls, boys.” (That is not meant as a slam on bisexuals in any way, merely a comment on the magazine’s selling of the story.) Or perhaps I’m just jealous Esquire got to have both Ellen Evan and Heather Morris sex it up in the same issue. Still, it’s always, always, always lovely to have another star join our big, weird family. Though what’s in the water over there at “True Blood?” First Anna Paquin, now Evan. Good gravy, how I wish Sookie and Queen Sophie-Anne could have been a couple instead of Beeeel.

Evan apparently dropped three “hints” to the Esquire interviewer before he fully caught on. The first that she “was always into very androgynous things. Guys, girls ... I’m into androgyny in general.” The second she is free and single these days and “up for anything. Meet a nice guy, meet a nice girl.” And then the last was that she would marry her “Mildred Pierce” co-star Kate Winslet is she could. Though, that’s not really much of a hint. Get in line, sister. Everyone would marry Kate Winslet if they could. Once the interviewer finally clued in and asked her if she dated women, she answered with a proud “Yes.”

ESQ: “Do you look for different things in men than in women?”
ERW: “Yeah, I’m more kind of like the guy when it comes to girls. I’m the dominant one.” It’s with women, she says, that her inner North Carolina gentleman comes out: “I’m opening the doors, I’m buying dinner. Yeah, I’m romantic.”

I’ve always admired Evan’s work. She had basically grown up right in front of our eyes. From “Once and Again” to “Thirteen” and “Across the Universe” to “The Wrestler,” I’ve always admired that she tends to picked smaller, smarter projects instead of, say, a superhero’s girlfriend. So welcome to the fold, darling. I know you like to pick up the check, but today the first round is on me. In fact, I’ll buy you two. The second one if for that beautiful scene between Jessie and Katie in “Once & Again.” It moves me still.